Everyone has different criteria needed to be placed on what I call "The priority list"
A priority list is a group of people you hold near and dear to your heart or would stop everything you're doing to give them your time. For me, to be on my priority list, I have to be on your priority list. If you do any of the following, it's a quick way to be removed from my priority list.
Being removed doesn't mean we're no longer friends. That would be extreme. It means that I'll treat you like someone I see at Dunkin' Donuts every morning. I say "Hello" engage in small talk and keep it moving.
First, we must know what the word "relationship" means. Many of us speak in "Laymen" which means we give words different meanings rather than the classical meaning. When I use the word relationship, I don't ONLY mean "Boyfriend and girlfriend", I'm including all human relationships that require effort on both ends.
Friendships
Fellowships
Business partnerships
Leadership
Brotherhoods
Sisterhoods
Parenthoods
All of them are "relationships"
Don't take my word for it, google it.
Granted that you are a good person, please heed the following warnings.
If your friend spills their heart out about their lives but won't listen to your life stories, you're not important enough to them and you don't need them in your priority list. Your person might defend themselves and say "but you spill your heart at the wrong times". First, ask yourself... does it happen even when it is a good time? If so, you have your answer. Try to be in places you feel wanted.
If your friend holds too many secrets that cripple trust between you two, sneak them off your priority list. If the secrets you find are too hard to endure. Question the strength of your relationship and ask yourself, they think I'm a fool? Do they talk about me behind my back? You can only know if they talk to you about other people behind their backs. You can usually tell how silent it gets when you walk out. Do a cost-benefit analysis and if what you want for the future of the relationship.
If your friend consistently leaves you behind when you plan to do things as a team, leave them off your priority list.
If your friend consistently hangs up in the middle of your sentence, shut them out of your priority list.
If your friend lets everyone pick a song on the aux/Bluetooth but you or anything similar to this, exclude them from your priority list.
If your logic is irrefutable in an argument for example "1 + 1 = 2 is a true statement" and your friend chooses to say it's a false statement out of spite or to hide something effectively engaging in cognitive dissonance consistently, calculate them out of your priority list.
If your friend is willing to throw away 10 years of friendship because you consoled a friend they hurt, throw them away from your priority list.
If your friend pretends that they don't remember something they did or said that was offensive to your relationship in an attempt to avoid hashing it out, forget they were ever on your priority list.
Make sure you cut out what you don't need because codependency is one of the worst addictions when the person you're with is bad for you.
Thank you
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